Oh Sh!t Day! The Day You Became a Single Mom

Published on Nov 18, 2015

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PRESENTATION OUTLINE

Oh Sh!t Day! The Day You Became a Single Mom

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I remember my Oh Sh!t Day like it was yesterday.

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The end of my marriage felt like the end of everything, and after awhile, the possibility of a new beginning.

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I had been married for 7 years and had a 2-year-old. I lived in Hawaii, with my then-husband, who was a military officer.

I was far away from home, no family go "home" to, and I was self-employed. Good and not-so-good, all at the same time.

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I've said since I first wrote The Successful Single Mom book that:

"Today is somebody's Oh Shit! day ... the day they became a single mom and realized exactly what that truly means."

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During the first few months after my divorce, I experienced all kinds of emotions:

panic, because I was surprised by the request for a divorce;

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excitement, because I didn't want to be married to him anymore either;

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excitement, because I'm a positive thinker and always look forward to the future;

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anger, because, well, wouldn't YOU be angry if someone asked you for a divorce on Mother's Day?

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Fear, because I wasn't sure I could handle being a single mom and everything that comes with being one,

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and finally relief, because I knew that the relationship wasn't right for me, but I didn't have the courage to make the change myself.

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Of the many single moms I've spoken to, they've all said they experienced many of the same emotions. It's not uncommon to feel them all on the same day.

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You might have just experienced your Oh Sh!t Day, and if you have, here are some things you need to know:

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1. You're going to experience uncomfortable emotions, and you just might feel like you're on a roller coaster that is no fun at all.

It will get better, and it will take time. Give yourself all the time you need.

2. It's okay to feel how you're feeling. It's not okay to harm yourself, your kids or your ex.

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3. This is a great time to take excellent care of yourself and your kids.

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4. You may want to talk to someone who can really help you, like a therapist or a divorce coach.

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Your kids might find great benefit in a therapist, too.

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5. The light at the end of the tunnel is not an oncoming train.

I rarely meet anyone {okay, I've never met anyone ever} who says, "I wish I'd stayed married."

They always {always!} say, "It was completely worth it, as much as it sucked. I just wish I'd done it sooner."

The old adage is true,
"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."

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You will find yourself, in a year or two, looking and feeling better than you have in years {maybe ever!}.

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When you're ready, pick up a copy of my book, The Successful Single Mom.

I wrote it because as a single mom who was also an executive coach, I had the benefit of having tools in my toolbox that I could use to help me get through the most challenges times after divorce and go on to more success and happiness than I could have ever imagined at the time.

Those tools are included in the book, and you can use them, too.

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Christina Culbertson

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