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Slide Notes

Biennial Conference of the Rhetoric Society of America

San Antonio, TX

May 2014

border war: online dating & the battle for marriage

Published on Nov 19, 2015

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PRESENTATION OUTLINE

border war: online Dating & the Battle for Marriage

Dawn Shepherd, Boise State University
Biennial Conference of the Rhetoric Society of America

San Antonio, TX

May 2014
Photo by JD Hancock

THE BATTLE FOR HOW AND BY WHOM MARRIAGE SHOULD BE DEFINED IS A TENSE BORDER WAR

Photo by Mukumbura

We are in a generalized crisis in relation to all the environments of enclosure—prison, hospital, factory, school, family. The family is an "interior," in crisis like all other interiors—scholarly, professional, etc. The administrations in charge never cease announcing supposedly necessary reforms: to reform schools, to reform industries, hospitals, the armed forces, prisons. But everyone knows that these institutions are finished, whatever the length of their expiration periods. ... These are the societies of control, which are in the process of replacing disciplinary societies. … There is no need to fear or hope, but only to look for new weapons. ("Postscript" 178)

In "Postscript on Control Societies," Gilles Deleuze contrasts MIchel Foucault's disciplinary societies and their reliance on confinement with control societies that use "free-floating control" to govern ("Postscript" 178). In his discussion he highlights five important institutions of confinement—prison, hospital, factory, school, and family—that are threatened as control societies emerge.

family in the late 20th century

a more problematic case than other institutions of confinement
Deleuze's prescient "Postscript" previews many early adoptions of control mechanisms that have become pervasive in our contemporary culture. Although he explicitly names the family as an interior in crisis, Deleuze does not return to it in the end of "Postscript." Perhaps Deleuze does not address the threats to the family—and any attendant new weapons of control—because the family in the late twentieth century was a more problematic case than the prison, the hospital, the factory, or the school.
Photo by conorwithonen

family

bodily intervention, management at a distance, population regulation
As the oldest social institution, both in terms of human history and individual lives, the family perseveres as a tool for bodily intervention, management of individuals at a distance, and population regulation.
Photo by kevin dooley

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On the one hand, proponents point to same-sex marriage as important to the preservation of families.

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On the other hand, opponents see same-sex marriage as threatening the traditional family.
Photo by davitydave

blended,
biological,
socially constructed

Though the place of same-sex marriage is contested, at least in religious and juridical spaces, the variety of possible familial formations has expanded.

"dangerous" identities

that may resist traditional disciplinary techiques
While an expansive definition could indicate the sustainability of the family as a social institution, it also calls into question its continued effectiveness as a disciplinary apparatus. After all, childless heterosexual couples, cohabitating homosexual couples, and latchkey children are all potentially "dangerous" identities that may resist traditional disciplinary techniques, and anxiety over these new familial formations is only heightened.

"more fair, more fulfilling,

and more effective at fostering well-being"
Just as our understanding of what it means to be a family has changed, so have the conditions of the married couple. As social historian Stephanie Coontz notes, the character of heterosexual marriage has "steadily become more fair, more fulfilling, and more effective in fostering the well-being of both adults and children than ever before in history" (Coontz 301).
Photo by WilliamMarlow

[Marriage] was the gateway to adulthood and respectability and the best way for people to maximize their resources and pool labor. This is no longer the case. Marriage still allows two people to merge resources, divide tasks, and accumulate more capital than they could as singles. But it is not the only way they can invest in their future. In fact, it's a riskier investment than it was in the past. The potential gains of getting married need to be weighed against the possibilities offered by staying single to pursue higher education or follow a better job. And the greater likelihood of eventual divorce reinforces the appeal of leaving your options open while investing in your own personal skills and experience. (Coontz 276-77)

According to Coontz, marriage no longer serves as an obligatory part of a "credentialing process that people have to go through to gain adult responsibility and respectability" (276).

FAMILY & Marriage

THREATENED BY CONTROL, LEFT WITHOUT NEW TECHNIQUES
There are two significant contemporary challenges for regimes of power when it comes to managing marriage and family, and this is where Deleuze had it right, both in conceiving of the family as an environment of enclosure threatened in control societies and in leaving it out of the institutions that had developed new techniques in relations of control.

FAMILY

one institution that isn't institutionalized
First, the family is the one institution Deleuze mentions that isn't institutionalized. That is not to say that families are unregulated, as both same-sex marriage legislation and investments in social welfare programs related to mothers and children demonstrate; however, there is no spatial institutionalization of the family.

contemporary marriage

both is and is not optional
Second, conceiving of marriage as a risky endeavor runs counter to its position as the cornerstone of the institution of the family. In the contemporary context marriage both is and is not optional. Individuals are no longer expected to marry in order to transition into adulthood, but many of the privileges of adult romantic partnerships are reserved for married couples.
Photo by SGphoto™

marriage

makes the institution of marriage
The crisis of the family in control societies, it seems, is a crisis of marriage. Marriage makes the institution of the family.

ONLINE DATING

works to preserve the marriage imperative
Today, converting singles to marrieds is a more challenging enterprise. Indeed, a post-marriage condition necessitates persuasive mechanisms for reconstructing the marriage trajectory, and online dating is one system that works to preserve the marriage imperative.
Photo by syder.ross

family

works better as disciplinary apparatus
As we have already seen, the family works better as a disciplinary apparatus than as a mechanism of control.

contemporary family & marriage

OPERATES SYNCHRONICALLY, ISOLATED SPATIALLY & TEMPORALLY
In our contemporary context, marital choice operates more or less under a synchronic logic isolated spatially and temporally.
Photo by Ivan Plata

DISCIPLINARY SOCIETIES

periodic marriage crises have been a source of anxiety
Photo by kevin dooley

DECREASING CONFINEMENT OF INDIVIDUALS WITHIN THE FAMILY

Uneasiness is the byproduct of the decreasing confinement of individuals within the family.
Photo by tim caynes

online dating

HELPS MARRIAGE TO REMAIN RELEVANT
It would seem that free-floating control, especially its modularity, should offer a fitting response to the challenges of confinement.
Photo by tmarsee530

modern family

neither mold nor modulation
It would seem that free-floating control, especially its modularity, should offer a fitting response to the challenges of confinement.
Photo by Nanimo

dawn shepherd

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